Was searching for a new beginning Cuz the last act had me reeling Honestly been thinking about quitting Cuz the punches just keep on hitting I’ve been watching someone I love waste away And I know that we all have to die someday But I’m just wondering why that day has to be today All the bright colors in my life have faded to gray I’m wondering what we all are really living for When trying to stay alive becomes a chore You’re breathing is shallow, just like mine But I no longer see the twinkle in your eyes You fight to stay alive; I know it hurts For the first time in my life I can’t find the words To bring peace to you or me, it’s a tragedy When the voices in my head sound like a symphony Hold on (Give up) Don’t let go (Let go) Keep it together (Come undone) Stay in control (You’re out of control) And I’m selfish, there’s no doubt about that But I wouldn’t wish this pain on anyone else I’ll take it stride, fake a smile, be that guy Cuz you depend on that version of me to survive I try to be strong, it’s just hard sometimes When you have no one to lean on in times of strife Cuz everyone else leans on you till you say it’s alright This façade of mine is getting old, brittle, and trite Tell you to love yourself but can’t even look in the mirror Maybe it’s cuz recently the image is much more clearer Been an uphill battle just to get to here And it’s an even longer road ‘till I’m in the clear Wanna take away your pain, but I don’t know how Feel things too deeply, makes me wanna tear my hair out Kill to feel nothing, just be comfortably numb That’s why I take these pills; temptations succumbed Trying to keep it together, but I’m coming undone This situation is futile; Icarus reaching the sun The story of my life, the second act of four I’m halfway there; already have my foot out the door Don’t have any answers, but got so many questions If I believed in God I’d think he was teaching me a lesson On how well I could do when he pulls out the rug But I know God is dead, that’s why I fucked with these drugs So maybe it’s my entire fault and this is what I deserve A wolf in sheep’s clothing trying to lead the herd Used to think I was special, now that just sounds absurd Like you, make it up as I go along word for word If she’s really man’s best friend, then this is a loss But the day that you’re born every one of your stars are crossed I’ll carry your memory with me for as long as I’ve got I just want to say thank you, I love you, so long Hold on (Give up) Don’t let go (Let go) Keep it together (Come undone) Stay in control (You’re out of control)

There's a blue devil on one shoulder, a bluebird on the other One tells me what to do; the other sings me a tune The blues, her melodies paint me blue As I enjoy the view from a windowless room I'm trapped, but it's not what you think I just wear this apathy like a wedding ring And I write to distance myself from feelings Hide in these metaphors cuz the truth cuts too deep As I sink into this chair these walls begin to bleed They gush out every hope and fear from tattered memories And I'm scribbling down saddened thoughts, sick fantasies Alienating everyone who's ever believed in me Everything collides always seems to be the motif A success story is never what it seems And if every song I write comes off like a eulogy Am I romanticizing my death or writing my reprieve? [Chorus] (x2) Fighting deep with the devil in me I’m begging you to medicate me Fighting deep with the devil in me I’m digging my grave six feet deep I’m alive, but I swear I’m barely breathing A swarm of yellow jackets keeps me reeling And I’m a downer; I guess you are what you eat An insomniac in a never-ending quest for sleep But if I make it to tomorrow, they will make me a king I'm like William S. Burroughs to the junkies and freaks I'm a big, bad wolf to the right kind of sheep A paranoid schizophrenic with a skewed set of beliefs And if every song I write is in a leering key it’s Cuz no one makes it out alive, that includes me I’d like to say I’m alright but it’s getting hard to breathe I’m slipping in between, forgot how many pills deep Fighting to stay alive is an ironic thing Cuz everyone else thinks it should come naturally A couple pills more and I could have been a tragedy What the hell would my brother think if he found me? [Chorus] (x2) It all looks picturesque and bright from the outside But on the inside I’m feeling decrepit and trite I understand your pain because it’s also mine This alienation is a symptom of the bright lights These feelings aren’t new; they’ve been growing within me I never asked the be lauded, my outlook is too bleak I tried to control this habit, instead it controlled me I’m trying to stay positive but I’m struggling [Chorus] (x4)

Sink into this scene as if from memory Her hips move with a ballerina’s consistency Moves through the room like she owns the building Becoming something more, a physical necessity Gravitate to her like a planet to a black hole Confident and cool, always in control Plays the game just like she’s a pro As our breathing becomes heavy the feeling plateaus We’re setting up the stage for a whole new tableau Two wounded souls that survived the bleeding heart show At a loss for words but we don’t even need to speak ‘cause conversation emerges from the rhythm of our heartbeats [Candace Dovie:] This body is a weapon This body is a gift This body knows to nurture This body knows to give This body is a weapon This body is a gift This body knows to nurture This body knows to take With a flick of her wrist she draws me in With a kiss on the lips I’m entrenched in sin With a whisper in my ear she cues me in Her body ends where mine begins Power in every sense of the word She stands tall like she’s on top of the world I’m trapped in her glow, a sea of greens and blues Her voice takes me to higher altitudes I’m lost in a mirage of translucent views A delirium that her presence subdues With her hand on my chest, the pain subsides When we’re entwined, everything collides At the end of the day, I’m every substance imbibed A chemical romance that fate prescribed It’s been a long road taken in short strides But the road is paved with gold at the end of the ride

She’s been looking in the mirror not liking what she sees Even though I keep telling her she’s beautiful to me But that’s not enough; she’s got to be beautiful to her If it doesn’t come from within it just sounds like words And I’ve been there before so I understand That real happiness comes from our own two hands And the walls we tear down by ourselves Cuz you can’t love someone else until you love yourself Came running headfirst out of a darker place And until right now had just been taking up space I know you’re in pain I can see it your face The way you try to hold back these tears with grace So you cut your wrists in private to feel something Cuz a pain that bleeds beats feeling nothing And I can’t promise you that things will always be perfect But I can tell you with assurance that you’re totally worth it [Chorus] (x2) Above all: Love yourself Love yourself Love yourself In middle school I was picked on and pushed around Made to feel worthless but I know better now That the one person you should count on is yourself You’re the only one that can pull yourself outta hell And once you know that you will feel empowered Once you love yourself you’ll blossom like a flower People will still try to put you down but it won’t work Cuz as long as you love yourself their words can’t hurt You’re beautiful no matter what your flaws may be You’re priceless and your existence matters to me It should matter to you too, you can pull yourself through It’s just a matter of perspective with attitude They are always gonna try to pull you down no matter what you do So just shrug your shoulders at them and keep doing you I know at times your situation may seem hopeless But I can tell you with assurance it’s not and I know this [Chorus] (x4) (When the going gets tough we ride through the rough Pick yourself back up, pick yourself back up) Now I look in the mirror and never think this is it I can always do better than what I present I’m worth a whole lot solely because I exist To help pull other people up out of the depths Spent my entire life in toxic relationships Done a lot of drugs and been with a lot of chicks But you can’t expect love if you don’t have it for yourself So I’ll sing it to the stars, tell the world to love itself [Chorus] (x4) (When the going gets tough we ride through the rough Pick yourself back up, pick yourself back up)

I can’t unsay it No way to explain it Got lost in the madness Of trying to follow the rabbit In a land of the sheep The wolf is king It’s a fickle thing Trying to follow your dreams How far does this go? I’m so out of control Pushed everyone away For promises of better days And now I’m all alone With nowhere to call home Was watching the throne When they cut me to the bone You said you wanted a leader So I took up arms But when I walked in the room I set off your alarm It’s like I’m on fire Been burning so long Can no longer feel the flames Can no longer see those scars It’s like I’m on every drug Cuz I feel so numb Won’t see old age Might never fall in love You wanted a king So I became a god Always wanted to be normal But just grew more odd I buried the hatchet Yeah, in my own back Made a living out of Exposing what I lack Tried to kill the scene It turned the gun on me Now I am nothing Die in obscurity You’re looking for love I’m looking for life But the door is closed Already knocked twice You don’t think I notice But I see it all You wanna act righteous? But it's all so wrong You see me as a puzzle That needs to be solved I see you as a struggle That I’ll never resolve Got pills for the pain You'd be high all day We're all the same Just trying to find our way You saw me as the victim Till I became the predator A wolf in sheep's clothing Is the deadliest threat I've heard Better men went insane Just trying to play the game How can I be any different? Look inward for blame This paper chase Just makes me sick But alongside love and grace We all need cash to live I need outta this city It's suffocating me It's a glorified prison Where all the inmates have keys Was the runt of the litter A bad apple in the bunch Looked harmless to the winners Until I grew up to stun I know it's hard to believe But now I wake up as a dream So afraid all I'll ever be Is Social Anxiety

It’s all a symptom of the bright lights Where the concrete carved out the landscape Where the talent terrors in the twilight We all might die in the limelight We go where the vine meets the sunset Where dreams go to die in stride If we make it they might call us blessed If we don't, it's the end of the ride Choke the 15 minutes and don't let go of it Until it's dead and buried and no one gives a shit In a world full of losers, every move is for the win In a world full of sheep, the wolf is the biggest hit Took the long road to the top and it killed your soles The one's at the top just cracked the whip You do what you can to shift the roles But you're captaining a sinking ship In a room full of snakes where the cameras flash They take and they take, you'll never get that back The dark horse rises out of the ash Hear the pitter-patter of the hooves on the track Go for gold despite the threat of being last The fear of insignificance doesn’t hold us back You want to be famous? Show some skin You want to make money? Gotta give in You want to be on top? Become a trend You want to be remembered? You’ve gotta transcend We’ve got enough kings, so they’ll make you a god Then you’ll be idolized despite all of your wrongs The lights will shine bright for you wherever you may be You won’t escape them ‘till they move onto the next thing Then you’ll fade out into irrelevancy 15 minutes gone, you were the flavor of the week This jetset life just wasn’t mean for the weak And some types of nostalgia just weren’t meant to repeat Captured lighting in a bottle once, how about that? But where do you go after the light fades to black? Hustling for something we can’t see but still envision Chase tears us by the seams ‘till we’re hanging by a thread But we still never expected the inevitable collision But the powers that be see to it we’re misled It’s all illusions; lifestyles you’re force-fed We’ve got these contusions, from years spent in the trench I’ve got this delusion that I’m better off dead The thirst for power is a feeling no man can quench Hollywood and Highland is my Jerusalem And I’m a social pariah mistaken for a messiah Santa Monica Blvd, heaven for the hooligans And I’m sick of this game, I’m fuckin’ retirin’ She said, “Fuck me, I’m famous! Why hate when you can get with this? Your music’s great, it makes me wet If you fuck me, you’ll be famous” She said, “Fuck me, I’m famous! Why hate when you can get with this? Your music’s great, but you need a break If you fuck me, you’ll be famous” She said, “Fuck me, I’m famous! Why hate when you can get with this? Your music’s great, it makes me wet If you fuck me, you’ll be famous” She said, “Fuck me, I’m famous! Why hate when you can get with this? Your music’s great, but you need a break So if you fuck me, you’ll be famous”

Deep soul of demise Caught between your lies Pressure built from underneath I’m caught up in this guise I’m a catacomb inside Devoid of all life Pressure bursting from within Cutting like a knife The fear of what is right Gouging out your eyes Pressure cracking the facade Won’t make it through the night Got you in my sights Could not hide it from the lights Pressure finally freeing me Tonight I ignite Johnny Walker drowns the spite Drinking downs the high Met a girl that gave me a fright Had open caskets for eyes So I shudder on sight Remove me from this plight Opened Pandora’s box To tempt the devil twice Kill me with your lies, contempt at your slight My expiration date is printed on my side Fill me with your cries, echoed through the night Don't mind me, I'm just along for the ride Lacerate me with enigmas until my veins erupt Drain the blood to fill up ten 16 ounce cups Hang me high and dry for the vultures to find Or feed me to the wolves, I swear I don't mind Whore me out once or twice, or maybe seven times Drug me with your intentions until I'm not fine Parade me around the room to make a pretty dime And then toss me away for the next one in line

I traversed the beaten path to the outskirts of town Where the outliers flock to bask in Hollywood’s scowl Was the runt of the litter, the first to sink and drown ‘till I grew fins and became a shark on the prowl Threw caution to the wind and it all crashed down But I rose through the flames like a phoenix just now Made nice with the man in the mirror with a frown And realized there’s more to life than being a cash cow When your friends ask where you've been and you can't even pretend Cuz the truth is more insane than any lie you can spread And you’re fighting with your fists and teeth clenched To prove to your critics you haven’t even peaked yet When your angels and demons are at war in your head And you’re trying your best not to let either win Cuz you’re tired from the rhyme and reason of it But you don’t have it within you to just quit Spent my whole life on a journey to the center of the self Where monsters and men tend to dwell Got carried out to sea where I survived on my own The current is where I made my home Spent my whole life on journey to escape this hell Until I realized heaven’s just a state of mind they sell They commodified our angst and were paid in blank checks Then paid for our noose’s as they hung us by the neck Waited patiently for a big break that never came Then rolled up my sleeves and got dirty paving my own way Dealt a rough hand so I stacked the deck in favor of me But I’m still more slept on than a mattress today Waited for an omniscient force to show me the way Until I realized god is dead and that’s okay Cuz now I can bury my illusions deep in a grave And revel in the fact that there’s no one left to save When your family asks where you’ve been and you can’t even pretend Cuz the lies are too ingrained and there’s doubt to suspend And you’re fighting every instinct to run away To spite the very people that made you who you are today When karma and grace are fighting for first place And the walls you built now cause you to suffocate And you’re tired from having ran for so long in place But you’re so over constantly trying to isolate Spent my whole life on a journey to the center of the self Where monsters and men tend to dwell Got carried out to sea where I survived on my own The current is where I made my home Spent my whole life on journey to escape this hell Until I realized heaven’s just a state of mind they sell They commodified our pain and were paid in blank checks Then paid for our noose’s as they hung us by the neck I’m trying to fit in like a I’m piece to the wrong puzzle It was the act of trying to fit in that caused me trouble So I’m trying to stand out from the rest of the crowd In a scene riddled with arguing of who is more loud So I hit the reset button and worked on my sound Till I could make the earth quake and cracks the ground All in all I’m trying to pull back the curtain and lift the shroud To show you what a life unbound is all about I don’t know about you but I’ve got my demons in check I’d like to thank my parents for raising a trainwreck Cuz I’ve overcome the shame of being another artist in chains And I’m still paving my own way even though I’m switching lanes But I’m still staring into a sea of blank faces Wonderin’ if I’ll go up in flames or rise to the occasion But until I die I’ll write life into dead spaces And carry this torch to lead our invasion Spent my whole life on a journey to the center of the self Where monsters and men tend to dwell Got carried out to sea where I survived on my own The current is where I made my home Spent my whole life on journey to escape this hell Until I realized heaven’s just a state of mind they sell They commodified our sound and were paid in blank checks Then paid for our noose’s as they hung us by the neck

I mastered self-immolation Got high and fucked the chick adjacent Bombed radio stations While riding bass trains to faces I come second to none Use my words like a weapon Fuck these sheep-brained complacents I’m on some higher brain placement I’m MENSA-status, Your brain’s ravaged My message appeals to the addicts Cuz I got a long list of bad habits That turn my nights into magic Make Catholic parents panic Bring comfort through static It’s just me outing my manic And I’m off again floating in the deep end Taking directions from the voices in my head Paid my dues, now I’m over that shit Done writing cues for someone else’s script And I’m off my meds and outta my mind again Just looking to suplex all of these trends Fuck acceptance, I’ve got enough friends Some are ride or die, the rest are just in my head Fuck your Air Jordans Fuck your Coach purse Fuck your fancy cars It's all a fucking farce Fuck the presidents Dead or otherwise Fuck the hood you grew up in Unless you got out alive Fuck your ex's, it's in the past Fuck the distractions and find your path Fuck the media, the radio too And the coffee shop anthems you sip to Fuck television ads for macrobrews Fuck this government and fuckin’ start a coup Fuck FOX, MSNBC, CNN Cuz they give no fucks about the truth Fuck the board of education And fuck student loans, too Fuck the SAT and ACT's Cuz they don't mean shit in the grander scheme Fuck minimum wage, fight for a living pay grade Fuck corporate bailouts, let 'em waste away Fuck the Kardashians, and Kanye too Fuck celebrity news and the hold that it has on you Fuck your drugs, I like mine much better Fuck your red carpets, I don’t care who wore it better Fuck social media, it’s not a form of protest When a company is still making millions off of your interests Fuck your hashtags, I don’t rap in those Fuck your opening acts, I open at the close Fuck your references, dated like ColecoVision Fuck your misogyny, you just sound fucking ignorant Fuck your feel-good movies, give me something realistic I like my art like my women, fucking sadistic Fuck addiction, learn to handle your shit better Fuck the quiet, I find peace in stormy weather Fuck your drama, grow the fuck up already This ain’t high school, we’re too old to act this unsteady Fuck the voices in my head cuz now we speak in unison Fuck what people think just do your own thing, my friends Fuck being normal, I’m done playing pretend Fuck me? Well, fuck you too, the end

[Chorus:] Turn the faders up, it’s revolution time You don’t know what to call it but it’s blowing your mind Might be the end of the world but that’s fine At least we’ll all die having a real good time Turn the volume up, it’s time for me to shine You don’t know what to do but you’re lovin’ the ride Might be a new beginning and that’s fine Cuz I’m not going down without a fight this time The volume knobs a drug for a fiend like me I keep turning that shit up like it’s BYOB I see a few people in the crowd eyeing me Like I entered their psyche like it was B&E Chicks askin’ if they can ride with me If you’re the Bonnie to my Clyde hop in a seat Bastard King’s got the beats to make you tap your feet Untitled’s on the mic like Usain’s with the speed I’m making the earth quake and causing tsunamis They should send FEMA to clean up after me I tip-toe the line between disaster and tragedy The equivalent of a hurricane to the rap scene If you’re not fucking with me you really should be Going all the way in like I’m uterus deep Fucking with these trends like a marketing team And raking in the earnings like a ponzi scheme [Chorus] The real life 21st century schizoid man Making every Christian fundamentalist say “goddamn!” Making every parent in the room shake their heads Hoping that their kids don’t end up like this I’m the 99th problem that Jay-Z couldn’t fix Your worst nightmare cuz I just don’t give a shit Cuz I used to care a lot and that shit was toxic Now I don’t trust someone as far as I can throw them I’ve got a demon in my pants and the devil in my head My obscenities on trial like I’m James Joyce in it Is it misogynistic if I grab my dick like this? Is it offensive of me to rap to you like this? Is it inappropriate if I’m staring at her tits Even though she’s the one that's flashing them? I’ve got a laundry list of people to make up with But I might just burn the list and say fuck it! [Chorus]

I fucked with the best and got fucked like the rest Till all the club drugs caused damage to my head Went on a bender just to register effects But it might have been just an escape attempt From performing to a crowd of vacant eyes I’m no longer trying to sell the world suicide If heaven’s court asks me for an alibi I’ll tell ‘em I was riding out a psilocybin high When voices in your head Tell you you're the best there is And the alcohol in your stomach Is making you feel shit You might crash and burn All over these kids Don’t forget what you had to go through To finally reach this And the silence in the crowd Is out of respect this time Because what you’re doing Transcends space and time They’re caught up in the moment You’re caught up in the act You give them fire They give you an atomic blast [Chorus:] Who would I be if I didn’t have this gift? That’d be like the Cure without Robert Smith I can’t thank you all enough for the support I get It makes me hopeful for whatever is next Saw a problem with the scene and suplexed the trend I’m wrestling with addiction but not letting it win Antagonized these demons to the point of no return But can’t go back on a one-way street, no u-turns If every old line I wrote was chronicling my end Consider this song the first chapter of my ascent If you’d thought I’d stay the same you weren’t listening Been floating on the winds of change since the beginning And if everything I do is out of the public’s eye Then honestly what’s there left of me to despise? I gave the world matches and they lit me sky high So every chance I have left is meant to defy [Chorus] Put your hands up if you’re glad to be alive The ultimate delusion is that we have enough time So why even bother trying to fall in line? You should be living life by your own design This is for all my heroes that aren’t better off dead I miss them all so much when I’m lost in my head But I know Mikey would just tell me to use this Miss you as a fan and friend Seen so many come up and meet their end But you can’t bust through walls unless you keep runnin’ You taught me to look for my voice in dark places And use it to propel the world to higher spaces We all know what to say, instead we choose to escape Before I build my empire I’m changing landscapes Came into this scene like I should be wearing a cape And if I’m ever successful, it’s not even fate It’s the hustle and the bustle that are paving my way Got dark thoughts in positive spots I’m trying to convey In an over-saturated scene, I’m darker shades of gray Forcing you to accept I’m not to be taken lightly Cuz there’s blood in the water and I’m a shark on the prowl With a mind sitting in some random venues lost and found I’ve given all I’ve got to this, be damned if it doesn’t pan out Cuz I’m the first rainfall after a decade long drought [Chorus]

30 mgs up, hedonist The girls in the back are feelin’ this Smoke circles form a heathen mist Carroll couldn’t even dream of this Down the sinkhole like a faucet drip Alice on methadone with a cut lip Just trying occupy the experiment One day I might be considered brilliant Knew this one chick from a porno flick With a habit of fuckin’ with acid The one that put the absinthe to my lips And told me to just take a sip And Ima keep my eyes on the prize, alright It’s 10 PM, got a girl at my side No X’s on her wrists so she’s ride or die We’re putting a dent in the stars tonight My eyes are lit up like no vacancy signs But still cool with us staying the night Ratchets on the dance floor tryin’ to fight Zig-zag in my hands tryin’ to ignite And I'm workin' on getting on their level so A plethora of chemical canvassing devils Help me cross the border in a new vessel While the sub in my head drowns out the treble But I’m running on time catching the red eye So any combo of concoctions will suffice When the synergy hits I’ll try to act surprised And won’t come down ‘till you hear the reprise Anything to help forget I’m bad at life Everyday’s a new day, another night to survive But instead of complaints, I’m gonna compromise Welcome to a night spent in a my mind Ashes to ashes, salvia salvaged the static While I wrote scriptures on napkins Ayahuasca ceremony supplanted magic ‘til all the neurons fixated the habit Melted my mind like lysergic acid There some other words in there I’d imagine Wash all your sins away with the absinthe Premonitions in the form of belladonna’s advent Drifting off to the sound of the synthesis Murdered the scene and left witnesses So they could spread word of my wickedness Carved my name into their niche markets What I do to music might be genocide But I’m hoping only the fittest will survive So we can put all the fat cats in a line And shoot the stupid motherfuckers one at a time I’m taking back the night song by song Until I bear no difference between lyrics and psalms And had my fill of wine from girls in thongs And danced all night until the break of dawn No coming undone, I’m getting better Living every night like I've got no collectors Reserved a spot in the realms of pleasure And stopped giving fucks that you could measure It starts with a single inhale of life And can stop just as quickly at the drop of a dime I’m just trying to see myself through this ride In the most epic vessel that life supplies It’s the art of death learning to survive And living in the moment where experience thrives It’s the beauty of life that won’t fade with a high And I’m getting it all ‘cause tonight is mine

There’s magic In the air This is how I’m spending my weekend babe Sipping a bottle of Cabernet Groovin’ to the music that sets the stage For the scene that is about to play A foolish young lover with a wicked brain And an ego you cannot hope to contain In the third week of a manic phase Till every flower I gave wilted away Young, dumb love is like novacaine When it numbs all of the pain Being with you is like I’m on cocaine Cuz you excite every single part of my brain I combed through every cruel neurosis And realized ignorance is bliss Found the city of gold in her lips When a pair of eyes fits the script It feels so good Yeah, it feels so good Make me feel so good Yeah, you feel so good Kill to be a fly on your wall But I’m the back of the club standing tall Drowning my fears with alcohol I’m setting myself up for this fall She’s a cannabis queen but I’m only a jester Just a young punk who will fail to measure I’ll fuck it all up just like the others Should leave her alone, not even bother She stares at me and points a finger And walks away, we play follow the leader Heartbeats echoing through the ether Temperatures rise as we connect features When it hit my brain all that glittered turned gold Her hands around my shoulders I went in slow Spotlight found us dancing like drones Pirouetted her way into my soul Never knew I had it in me to let go All I had to do was surrendered control Gave me a sneak peak of the throne That showed me this heart had a home And we can keep doing this thing all night You can come home with me, sleep by my side Or we can take three of these and fuck all night Till the sun comes up in the morning time And no one else will ever understand Ignore all my O-faced ex-girlfriends Who keep telling themselves “I’m over him” But text me sayin’ “you can still hit this” Fuck a notch on my belt, you’re a wedding band My greatest delusions weren’t this grand And even if all roads lead to the end I’d rather face the beaten path holding your hand A chemical reaction that ignited a trend Excuse me, I’ve got some disbelief to suspend And even if this doesn’t go as planned I’ll still be glad that it even happened It feels so good Yeah, it feels so good Make me feel so good Yeah, you feel so good

In win or lose scenarios I’m a deeper shade of “played” As the ecstasy in this evening keeps me wide awake Feeling like Leary transcending time and space With a little A$AP Rocky as the soundtrack to my wake Every hand I take’s a White Rabbit leading me astray And every road I take is another path to the grave While a calming voice in my head tells me I’m okay I’m on the rougher end of 500 mgs intake With my head spinning in every single way And my stomach feeling more defiant than brave Vapor trails provide a system to escape Mary Jane’s green eyes sweeping me away Dilated pupils provide a haunting gaze Echo through my mind like a parade of snakes Psychotropic medleys of distorted charades Voices in my head saying “help’s on the way” Help’s on the way (x6)

Here’s to the nights that were never wasted Even if all we ever did was get faded Here’s to the moments that kept us complacent Spent with the people you considered the greatest Here’s to the hearts that would not stay vagrant And all the times we promised we’d be famous Here’s to running through life with untied laces And coming out big like a day at the races Here’s to every flaw I bravely embraced And turned into a strength to pave the way Here’s to all the times I should have walked away But stayed to make sure that you were okay Here’s to the demons I could not escape But united like a choir to fill the dead space Here’s to the people who left without a trace I’ve learned some just aren’t worth the chase Here’s to the ex-lovers that laid me to waste And the one who followed that could carry my weight Here’s to the easy road I could never take Cuz I could never do without each beautiful mistake Here’s to the goodbyes I had to say Cuz life just had different plans for me Here’s to every heart I had to break Cuz something bigger was calling my name Here’s to every hand I chose not to take Cuz I was too proud to accept the help you gave Here’s to every pill I swallowed in vain In order to feel like I was of sane Here’s to those who cared to stay Cuz they knew I’d be a butterfly in the next stage Here’s to the heroes who’ve gone to the grave Who were not afraid to light the way Here’s to every time I was led astray By a funny little voice in the back of my brain Here’s to every song that was a saving grace Bridging the gap between security and fame Here’s to every time I abandoned my faith Cuz reason was an easier thing to parlay Here’s to the people who felt disgraced By the slightest mention of my name Here’s to making the most of what life gave And not taking a second of it in vain Here’s to what compels me to the stage Forget when I said being different doesn’t pay Here’s to every dollar I made rain In hopes that my art could inspire change Here’s to every time I ignited a flame And rose like a phoenix from the ashtray